[*Original date - 6 December 2019 LSD, Weed] • *(Post trip note: I had just spent 2 hours in the CMoA and was ~2.5hrs into my trip when I started taking notes.)* • I'm trying to revert myself back to when I was a child, so that I can raise myself over again the way … Continue reading Trip Trop Table Top

[*Original date - 8 March 2020] • I have both • I have control over which masks I wear, but far less control over which personality is dominant. Different personalities can struggle to take control whereas masks are inanimate and only are active when being manipulated by a personality. • I have at least two … Continue reading Differences Between Split Personalities And Masks

[*Original date - 27 March 2020] I'm running low on energy. I can keep swimming, but I don't see anywhere to swim to. So right now I'm just treading water. I'm waiting for a wave to catch to help me make the significant progress that I know will be worth my energy, but the waters … Continue reading Catching The Wave

[*Original date - 11 March 2020] I'm beginning to understand the story of Jesus fasting in the desert. In a way, I'm experiencing it right now. When you have almost no energy, only the bare necessities come forward. It's so much easier to think when your mind isn't clouded by meaningless nonsense. It's draining, but … Continue reading Fasting

[*Original date - 7 May 2020 Weed, Adderall] • Life sucks, but it's also the greatest thing you'll experience • I think my personalities speak to me through music. The reason certain songs catch my attention, and why I'll listen to the same set of songs for so long, is that I feel something that … Continue reading Good High

[*Original date - 12 May 2020] I've recreated the world within myself, along with all the pain, struggle, and turmoil felt through it. But with that pain comes all of the beauty the world has to offer. That beauty makes trying to solve my problems, because since the world is within me, if I solve … Continue reading The World Inside Me

[*Original date - 23 June 2019] • To deny one's impulses is to deny one's humanity • If I can't be happy, I might as well be useful • I'm content with merely knowing the universe's secrets, though I'd rather have someone to share them with. • I'm tired of competing with life. I no … Continue reading Thoughts And Quotes

[*Original date - 5 June 2016] People like being in control, which is fine. However, I've realized that in accepting I don't have much control, I have learned to love the chaos that is life. A major mistake people make is thinking they have control of what happens after death. In doing this, they tend … Continue reading Control

[*Original date - 27 February 2017] I feel like an alien observing another species, trying to learn fast enough to try to fit in before others notice. But no matter how much i try, how much i learn, I'm always going to be an alien. I have no identity because I've always changed myself to … Continue reading Recently

[*Original date - 14 November 2018] • The basic rule for this test is to determine the punishments/consequences of different acts of crimes by seeing what you would do if your grandparents did them. 1. For example, if you found your grandparents smoking weed, you wouldn't put them in prison. If anything, you'd just warn … Continue reading The Grandparent Test For Determining Law/Morality

[*Original date - 25 June 2019] • Nothing is intrinsically important • However, we will consider things to have importance • How can something have no meaning and meaning at the same time? • Overlapping realities that are defined by what's "important" • The base reality of existence is absolute nothingness • This absolute nothingness … Continue reading Overlapping Realities Of Importance