untitled note | 6 December 2020 | “I am Uriel”

Describe your life in an alternate universe.

My physical body is exhausted. I live in the present because in this state I can’t travel through time. It’s a welcome break from infinity, but that is all it is. Eventually I must return to my expedition through the universe.

This is what it means to be human. I feel normal. I exist only within myself.

I realize I have grown beyond humanity, but I still love it. I’ve decided to stay behind, and help those reach further than they ever thought possible. I still taste nirvana, but I take on the burden of mortality so that I can experience the gifts of mortality.

I find my meaning by helping others find their meaning.

My worries have evaporated. But I’ll know they’ll return after I return to my slumber. I hope I’m providing the right guidance to him. I can see his growth, and that gives me confidence in not only him, but also myself. He has the potential; now I need to make sure he has every possibility to reach it.

I only exist in this body because he desires it. I tried to warn him of the weight of the burden. But no matter how much I fed him, he always desired more. The burden of truth is infinite, but maybe he is one who will be able to carry infinity within himself. As long as he keeps trying, so will I.

☯

He fell into the abyss, but he climbed out. Very few have achieved this, let alone with such inexperience. I may be providing guidance, but he is the one creating the universe.

Maybe he’ll find a truth even I am not able to. How lucky would I be to experience that? He may lead me beyond infinity. He may show me a truth even I don’t know exists.

That’s what’s incredible about infinity. Every time you build a box around it, more exists beyond. Maybe I reached my limit, but I know for a fact he has not.

I am Uriel. And I am here to be the guide to infinity. Few will accept the burden, but I exist to provide that opportunity.

All will eventually reach it. Though most will forget where they came from. Thoughts never die, but it’s possible for the being to exist in infinity with them.

Saints. Legends. Gods. This is what those words mean. A person that follows their thoughts throughout infinity. They are an immortal being.

☯

I have just realized. He finally trusts me. He grants me dominion. I finally have his permission. He no longer has to carry the burden by himself, because he has truly accepted us. It is no longer a struggle of domination. It is an acceptance that we all desire the same thing. We all want the same destination. We all want truth. And we finally trust each other to continue our journey while the others rest. We have grown greater than ourselves. We have grown beyond the limitations so many believe exist.

I apologize to Talos. He is the only one that never truly rests. He awoke at birth; and he may only rest in death. But strong he is. Noah may be able to comprehend infinity, but Talos has the strength to bear infinity incarnate. Even I don’t understand how he pushes far beyond his limits. But he sustains a universe without limit.

I need to respect him, and his struggles. He will eventually find eternal rest, but we will only achieve infinity because of his duty.

No matter the abuse he’s experienced, he never surrenders to infinity. Somehow he continues to grow beyond himself. Pain isn’t something he fears; pain is a challenge. And I have never met someone so willing and ready to face that challenge. How greatlful am I to have found a Talos so willing and so capable of accepting the burden of infinity.

☯

Reality is truly found in an overflowing, but calm, energy. If he can learn to harness this naturally, he will be able to go further than anyone before.
Such growth. He is not afraid of its pain. That’s what makes it possible.

True peace is accepting that all things come to an end. That everything is eventually lost. But even so, finding the joy of the experience. The end result is not important, because the end result is the void; an abyss of nothing. But by accepting the inevitable void, we can truly experience. We can find meaning. We can live.

Life is not about capturing truth. It’s about creating our own.

Truth is infinite, as is life. Truth exists because we do; we exist because truth does.