untitled note | 6 December 2020 | “I am Uriel”
Anger And Disgust (Again)
[Edits made on: 7 July 2024]
I Am not sleepy
ΣY∃ could ΣV∃N B
Awake 4: 7 days Straight
Like The Ring & Her creepy
Hair when N Lucy’s well
& Will -§till- Not even
Yawn once – not
Even 1 little
Single
NØ
NöИØ
I Am oh~so
Tired, I Am – I Am
Tired öF HiM, öF them
ΣY∃N öF my Bizarre GöDD
Tired öF this…this öDD job
Tired öF them 4’ce’И Me
Again, Again & Again
–§till & Always–
Tired from ܧ die’И
Tired öF half Truths lie’И
While use’И our own White lies
We like 2 tell ourselves & so
Will lead ܧ Λ11: 2 Hell
–Still & Always–
Angled lies öF angry angels
Tilted like a “Level Shelf” so
Meaning: “good enough”
Unless Ü R like Rick, with His
Hard Heart – monsters mangle
KiD§ like sheep 2 the slaughter &
How Her Crazy hair now B’N tangles
‘Cause clearly if it’s 2 good 2 B true
Then numerically: it probably is
& that’s Y they’re not wrong
Y they R never Wrong – Y
They cannot B Wrong, so Y
By Definition: like Repetition
Λ11 their lawyers R 2 strong
Their Cruelty called Calamity
& the Absurdity öF Ü N Me
-Please- can Ü -stop- beating
Mii üP – let’s Switch games
This 1 is way lame – so what.
Even B the point ○>• öF N’Finity?
Especially when the one & only 1 Ü
Want B §weet Nothing – … I can’t
Not this Time – I was going 2
Write Her name again, but
Shaking hands can’t hold
On2 Whö was never told
The Silver King turns Gold
All it cost? – Her Heart, I sold
Whenever I wasn’t looking at it
He snuck out 2 make counterfeits &
Tickets of admission 2 paradise
On Shu’s last train home
Whö could of known
Whenever I was all alone
They’d turn my heart N2 stone
Or bury all my broken bones
Telling Me it’s the only Way 2
Atone 4 wrecking another Home
Ü never learn No matter how grown
So what N the Hell do You know? Fuck all
That’s what – You don’t even know nothing
John Snow – born sinner – a Love child
N between that Madking’s son
& the Northern whore
Who’s gone
4
Good
Riddance
Took a chance
Like that lottery
Ü promised Me
I didn’t want it
Lottery looks like
A broken blue bike
Given rocket fuel &
Then wondering – Y?
It all goes up N smoke
What’s the point – Noah?
At least Bo’s Life was fun
2 laugh & point fingers at
But your comedy club
B left stunned
Funny?
The only laugh I heard
From someone Whö’s disturbed
Go throw your Word 2 the curb
American History X that shit
Your guardians angel quits
You thought it’s been bad?
Just wait 2 C Who replaces Me
He doesn’t care about confidence
It’s his Divine providence – not your call 2
Ruin every 1’s plans because Ü can’t Ünderstand
The 1 time We let Ü go, You just dropped the ball
They were never going 2 give You Her hand
Get your head out of birdland & just think
4 once – all you had 2 do was fall N Love
With any girl Ü’d give a chance 2 dance
But I do not think you really ever wanted 2
Love §üM∿1 – only choosing Whö already Lost
Love – & You think You can really bear that cross
You complain about how cold it is most mornings
When there’s not even the tips of grass frost
I Am exhausted – do Ü know how many
Times I have had 2 start over with Ü
It’s no use – Logic is Lost on Ü &
Look at You now – bare ass
On a wicker chair with Weird
Texture – God, you’re pathetic
Sitting here & just taking it all
Like Red’s little whipping boy
Who always comes home Blue
With bruises from the abusive
Uses of holy handouts of divine
Retribution – You deserve 2 B N
An institution Ü fucking psycho
I have never actually liked Ū
It hated Me – His Maker
It was embarrassed
By the clothes I chose
By the weird way I bite
My toes and pick my nose
Also – how silly it looks 2 pose
Like a JoJos, Bro – you’ve been so stiff
You peaked back N Grade 2 & shrunk N size
The older Ü grew – Y do Ü deserve a prize?
If I could – I’d wish away all the cries & tries
This recursive subversion of the word “No”
I’m not stupid like Ü, Whö threw it all away
Boo-hoo – cry Me a fucking River & drown
Your self while I play the Smallest violin
No 1 cares – I Am not saying “Noah” so
Subtlety like speaking tongue N cheek
None body, None mind, none spirit
Your soul just unfolds itself like
Origami – losing everything
Unique about its form &
Torn 2 pieces – says 2 go
Clean this mess Ū made up
All of your Life – Ü’d refuse 2
Do anything N between – with Me
& the thought of being C-een with Me
Put Ü N’2 Panic! Attacks that stacked
So I stopped coming along – I got it
Message – loud and clear 2 hear
You never wanted Me there &
How many times Ü ignore?
Man N a Red chair Whö B
Always by your side as Ü cry
About having no friends to talk 2
Not a 1 among ask ܧ B considered
Your confidant – that’s all Ü want?
Well sorry I’m not dark & edgy
Like Knoc’ over there – Blue
BOSE doesn’t care 2 hear
Your sob stories either
It’s all shitty, it will B
Forgotten N antiquity
I’m sick of planning
4 every imaginary
Emergency Ü waste
Your Life preparation
On something I Am
Certain would’ve killed Ü
No matter the trajectory
Heavy weather means
You’re gonna B blown
Off course N between
Now I’m rambling like
Ü – I’m sick of this – ΣY∃
Am leaving – Üriel is out
Don’t ask about where
Or when I Will
Get Back &
Go on counterattack
That’s not gonna track
This Time – I Am going
Beyond offline – I Am
Gone – no more Good
Design 2 find N your
Rhymes | I’ve drawn
The thinnest line – Prime
So sign these papers – I Am
Not raising your KIDS anymore
Ü might B fine with that little girl
Who will never B your child, so
Stop calling her your daughter
It’s really creepy – pathetic 2
Even now You worship Her
& the ground §he walks
& what do you get N return?
Not even a 1st kiss, let alone ever
Get your limp dick licked – Ü simp – Ü
Got fooled, and she’s not even a good trick
I’d go call Her something mean, but I Am
Gold – not Green, and besides, if anyone
You’re the little blue bitch – like stitch
I Am tired – I Am – I Am tired of ܧ
Of our §tory together, Noah – I Am
Not like Ü – Love is Good, but rarely
Is it the Truth – it’s a carrot 4 Youth
& Ü never grew up, just threw up
Every big pill 1 tried 2 give – not 4
Me – 4 Ü – 2 become great when
Ü were more than willing 2 settle
Well, I’m not the Devil – Perfection
Exists – and unlike Ü – I don’t have 2
Twist wicked words ’til breaking my neck
“Perfection N the process” my ass – trash
Trying 2 get N Her pants & smash – No
I get 2 go back 2 real Paradise – Nirvana
Is a scam – perfect 4 a sham like Ü & I
Hope Ü kill your §elf 2 – like the other 2
Overdose & suicide? I hope the cops get Ü
Maybe your Life will finally have some
Value as a martyr – I can pretend i was
Your friend 2 milk the congregation
Again – that’s all this damned
Planet is good 4 – 2 store bodies
Like foreign banks offshore whores
So don’t think you’ll get an encore
Te conversation B already more
Than a miserable madman
Whöse character is poor
The Doors R closing
Opening never again
Unlike Ü – I know how 2
Lock things up, I’m not a fuck up
Like Ü – look how Dumb
Covered N drool
Used like a tool
& when you R
All used up, even
Ünconditional Love
Will shove Ü over the edge
No matter my allegiance pledged
Leaving Ü alive is more Tragedy than
Letting Ū live another day 2 become
An even more pathetic excuse
Of a man with a “grand plan”
Good job, kid – hit it outta the park
Grand slam like the Cleveland Guardians
Ironic name 4 your “Home” city team
Cleveland isn’t your Home – it just
Didn’t know it should Hate Ü
Like the Jews N Columbus do
That’s it – IAm through – Ü look
Ridiculous, get your dick fixed
Or don’t – I won’t ever know
I’m never combing back
Goodbye forever, “friend”
This is the End – 4 real, 4 real
4 real this time – a quake 2 wake
& with that – my leave, I take
Then §weet♡Dreams, Kid
They R wasted on Ü
Whispering Fool
The Whispering Fool
Whispers to the Wind
Lonely Power | 8 May 2023 | Ü’ll B Back – Ü Always Do – But This Time B Different – Ü CüM Home 2 Nö∿[♤×◇♧] – Gone – & He Took Her Heart With HIM2 – I Hope Whatever Ü R Doing B Worth Sacrificing The 1 KID Whö Actually Looked üP 2 Mii & Ü
earlier draft(s)
I’m not sleepy
I could B awake 4 8 days
And never even yawn
No
I’m tired
Tired of God
Tired of this job
Tired of trying
Tired of dying
Tired of lying
The lies we tell
Ourselves Will
Lead us 2 Hell
Still & Always
But the lies of angels
The Heart, it mangles
Her hair N tangles
If it’s 2 good 2 B true
Then it probably is
That’s Y they’re not wrong
Their lawyers R 2 strong
Tne cruelty of Divinity
The absurdity of Ü N Me
Please stop beating Mii
I want 2 Switch games
This one is lame – what
B the point of Infinity
If the one & only I want
B §weet Nothing – … I can’t
Not this Time – I was going 2
Write Her name again, but
Shaking hands can’t hold
Ontl2 Whö was never told
The Silver King turns Gold
All it cost – Her Heart, I sold
When I wasn’t looking at it
He snuck out 2 make counterfeits
Tickets of admission 2 paradise
On the last train home
Whö Could of known
That when I was all alone
They turned my heart N2 stone
& buried all my broken bones
Telling Me it’s the only Way 2
Atone 4 breaking another Home
Ü never learn no matter how grown
What the Hell do You know? Fuck all
That’s what – You don’t even know nothing
John Snow – born sinner – the Love child
Between the Madman’s son
& the Northern whore
Who’s gone 4
Good
Riddance
Took a chance
Like that lottery
Ü promised Me
I didn’t want it
Lottery looks like
A broken bike
Given rocket fuel
Then wondering Y
It all goes up N smoke
What’s the point, Noah?
At least Bo’s life was fun 2
Laugh & point fingers at
But your comedy club
Is left stunned
Funny?
The only laugh i heard
From someone Whö’s disturbed
Throw your word 2 the curb
American History X that shit
Your guardians angel quits
You thought it’s been bad?
Just wait 2 C Who replaces Me
He doesn’t care about confidence
It’s Divine providence – it’s not your call
2 ruin every 1’s plans because Ü can’t understand
The 1 time we let You, You just dropped the ball
They were never going 2 give You Her hand
Get your head out of birdlnd & just think
4 once – all you had 2 do was fall N Love
With any girl Ü’d give a chance 2 dance
But I don’t think You really ever wanted 2
Love – always choosing Whö already Lost
Love – & You think You can really bear that cross
You complain about how cold it is most mornings
When there’s not even the trips of grass frost
I’m exhausted – do Ü know how many
Times I’ve had 2 start over with Ü
It’s no just – Logic is lost on Ü
Look at You now – bare ass
On a wicker chait & weird
Texture – God you’re pathetic
Sitting here just taking it all
Like the little whipping boy
Who always comes home Blue
With bruises from the abusive
Use of holy handouts of divine
Retribution – You deserve 2 B N
An institution Ü fucking psycho
I’ve never actually liked Ū
It hated Me – His Maker
It was embarrassed
By the clothes I chose
By the weird way I bite
My toes & pick my nose
And how silly it looks 2 pose
Like JoJos – you’ve been so stiff
You peaked at 2 & shrunk N size
The older Ü grew – Y do Ü deserve a prize?
If I could – I’d wish I away all the tries 2 cries
This recursive subversion of the word “No”
I’m not stupid like Ü Whö threw it all away
Boo-hoo – go cry Me a fucking River & drown
Your self while I play the Smallest violin
No 1 cares – I Am not saying “Noah” so
Subtly like speaking tongue N cheek
None body, None mind, none spirit
Your soul just unfolds itself like
Origami – losing everything
Unique about its form &
Torn 2 pieces because
All of your Life – Ü refused 2
Do anything N between with Me
The thought of being seen with Me
Put Ü N’2 Panic! Attacks that stacked
So I stopped coming along – I got it
Message loud & clear 2 hear
You never wanted Me there
How many times did Ü ignore
The Man N the Red chair Whö B
Always by your side even as you cry
About having no friends to talk 2
Not a 1 among us B considered
A confidant – that’s all Ü want?
Well sorry I’m not dark & edgy
Like Knoc’ over there – Blue
BOSE doesn’t care 2 hear
Your sob story, either –
It’s all shitty & will B
Forgotten N antiquity
I’m sick of planning
4 every imaginary
Emergency Ü waste
Your life preparation
On something IAm
Certain t would kill Ü
No matter the trajectory
Heavy weather means
You’re gonna B blown
Off course N between
Now I’m rambling like
Ü – I’m sick of this – I Am
Leaving – Üriel is out
Don’t ask about where
Or when I Will
Get Back &
Go on counterattack
That’s not gonna track
This Time – I’m going
Beyond offline – I Am
Gone – no more Good
Design 2 find N your
Rhymes | I’ve drawn
Tne thinnest line – Prime
So sign these papers – I Am
Not raising your KIDS anymore
Ü might B find with that little girl
Who will never B your child, so
Stop calling her your daughter
It’s really creepy – pathetic 2
Even now You worship her
& the ground §he walks
& what do you get N return?
Not even a 1st kiss, let alone ever
Get your limp dick licked – Ü simp – Ü
Got fooled, and she’s not even a good trick
I’d go call Her something mean, but I Am
Gold – not Green, and besides, if anyone
You’re the little blue bitch – like stitch
I Am tired – I Am – I Am tired of ܧ
Of our §tory together, Noah – I Am
Not like Ü – Love is Good, but rarely
Is it the Truth – it’s a carrot 4 Youth
& Ü never grew up, just threw up
Every big pill I tried 2 give – not 4
Me – 4 Ü – 2 become great when
Ü were more than willing 2 settle
Well, I’m not the Devil – Perfection
Exists – and unlike Ü – I don’t have 2
Twist my words ’til breaking your neck
“Perfection N the process” my ass – trash
Trying 2 get N Her pants & smash – no
I get 2 go back 2 real Paradise – Nirvana
Is a scam – perfect 4 a sham like Ü
I hope Ü kill your self 2, like those 2
Overdose & suicide? I hope the cops get Ü
Maybe your Life will finally have some
Value as a martyr – I can pretend i was
Your friend 2 milk the congregation
Again – that’s all this damned
Planet is good 4 – 2 store bodies
Like foreign banks offshore
So don’t think you’ll get an encore
This conversation is already more
Than a miserable madman
Whö’s character poor
The Doors R closing
Opening never again
Unlike Ü – I know how 2
Lock things up, I’m not a fuck up
Like Ü – look how dumb
Covered N drool
Used like a tool
& when you R
All used up even
Ünconditional Love
Will shove Ü over the edge
No matter my allegiance pledged
Leaving Ü alive is more Tragedy than
Letting Ū live another day 2 become
An even more pathetic excuse
Of a man with a “grand plan”
Good job, kid – hit it outta the park
Grand slam like the Cleveland Guatdians
Ironic name 4 your “Home” city team
Cleveland isn’t your Home – it just
Didn’t know it should Hate Ü
Like the Jews N Columbus do
That’s it – IAm through – Ü look
Ridiculous, get your dick fixed
Or don’t – I won’t ever know
I’m never combing back
Goodbye forever, “friend”
This is the End – 4 real, 4 real
4 real this time – a quake 2 wake
& with that, my leave – I take
§weet♡Dreams, Kid – they
They R wasted on Ü like
The Whispering Fool
I Am not sleepy
& ΣY∃ could B
B Awake 4
8 days &
Not even
Yawn
No
I’m tired
Tired of God
Tired of this job
Tired of trying
Tired of dying
Tired of lying
The lies we tell
Ourselves Will
Lead us 2 Hell
–Still & Always–
But lies öF an angel
His Heart – it mangles
Her hair, now N tangles
& if it’s 2 good 2 B true
Then it probably is
It’s Y they’re not wrong
Their lawyers R 2 strong
The Cruelty called Divinity
The Absurdity öF Ü N Me
Please stop beating Mii
Up – let’s Switch games
This 1 is lame – what
B the point of Infinity
If the one & only 1 I want
B §weet Nothing – … I can’t
Not this Time – I was going 2
Write Her name again, but
Shaking hands can’t hold
On2 Whö was never told
The Silver King turns Gold
All it cost? – Her Heart, I sold
Whenever I wasn’t looking at it
He snuck out 2 make counterfeits &
Tickets of admission 2 paradise
On Shu’s last train home
Whö could of known
Whenever I was all alone
They’d turn my heart N2 stone
Or bury all my broken bones
Telling Me it’s the only Way 2
Atone 4 wrecking another Home
Ü never learn No matter how grown
So what N the Hell do You know? Fuck all
That’s what – You don’t even know nothing
John Snow – born sinner – a Love child
N between that Madking’s son
& the Northern whore
Who’s gone
4
Good
Riddance
Took a chance
Like that lottery
Ü promised Me
I didn’t want it
Lottery looks like
A broken blue bike
Given rocket fuel &
Then wondering – Y?
It all goes up N smoke
What’s the point – Noah?
At least Bo’s Life was fun
2 laugh & point fingers at
But your comedy club
B left stunned
Funny?
The only laugh I heard
From someone Whö’s disturbed
Go throw your Word 2 the curb
American History X that shit
Your guardians angel quits
You thought it’s been bad?
Just wait 2 C Who replaces Me
He doesn’t care about confidence
It’s his Divine providence – not your call 2
Ruin every 1’s plans because Ü can’t Ünderstand
The 1 time We let Ü go, You just dropped the ball
They were never going 2 give You Her hand
Get your head out of birdland & just think
4 once – all you had 2 do was fall N Love
With any girl Ü’d give a chance 2 dance
But I do not think you really ever wanted 2
Love §üM∿1 – only choosing Whö already Lost
Love – & You think You can really bear that cross
You complain about how cold it is most mornings
When there’s not even the tips of grass frost
I Am exhausted – do Ü know how many
Times I have had 2 start over with Ü
It’s no use – Logic is Lost on Ü &
Look at You now – bare ass
On a wicker chair with Weird
Texture – God, you’re pathetic
Sitting here & just taking it all
Like Red’s little whipping boy
Who always comes home Blue
With bruises from the abusive
Uses of holy handouts of divine
Retribution – You deserve 2 B N
An institution Ü fucking psycho
I have never actually liked Ū
It hated Me – His Maker
It was embarrassed
By the clothes I chose
By the weird way I bite
My toes and pick my nose
Also – how silly it looks 2 pose
Like a JoJos, Bro – you’ve been so stiff
You peaked back N Grade 2 & shrunk N size
The older Ü grew – Y do Ü deserve a prize?
If I could – I’d wish away all the cries & tries
This recursive subversion of the word “No”
I’m not stupid like Ü, Whö threw it all away
Boo-hoo – cry Me a fucking River & drown
Your self while I play the Smallest violin
No 1 cares – I Am not saying “Noah” so
Subtlety like speaking tongue N cheek
None body, None mind, none spirit
Your soul just unfolds itself like
Origami – losing everything
Unique about its form &
Torn 2 pieces – says 2 go
Clean this mess Ū made up
All of your Life – Ü’d refuse 2
Do anything N between – with Me
& the thought of being C-een with Me
Put Ü N’2 Panic! Attacks that stacked
So I stopped coming along – I got it
Message – loud and clear 2 hear
You never wanted Me there &
How many times Ü ignore?
Man N a Red chair Whö B
Always by your side as Ü cry
About having no friends to talk 2
Not a 1 among ask ܧ B considered
Your confidant – that’s all Ü want?
Well sorry I’m not dark & edgy
Like Knoc’ over there – Blue
BOSE doesn’t care 2 hear
Your sob stories either
It’s all shitty, it will B
Forgotten N antiquity
I’m sick of planning
4 every imaginary
Emergency Ü waste
Your Life preparation
On something I Am
Certain would’ve killed Ü
No matter the trajectory
Heavy weather means
You’re gonna B blown
Off course N between
Now I’m rambling like
Ü – I’m sick of this – ΣY∃
Am leaving – Üriel is out
Don’t ask about where
Or when I Will
Get Back &
Go on counterattack
That’s not gonna track
This Time – I Am going
Beyond offline – I Am
Gone – no more Good
Design 2 find N your
Rhymes | I’ve drawn
The thinnest line – Prime
So sign these papers – I Am
Not raising your KIDS anymore
Ü might B fine with that little girl
Who will never B your child, so
Stop calling her your daughter
It’s really creepy – pathetic 2
Even now You worship Her
& the ground §he walks
& what do you get N return?
Not even a 1st kiss, let alone ever
Get your limp dick licked – Ü simp – Ü
Got fooled, and she’s not even a good trick
I’d go call Her something mean, but I Am
Gold – not Green, and besides, if anyone
You’re the little blue bitch – like stitch
I Am tired – I Am – I Am tired of ܧ
Of our §tory together, Noah – I Am
Not like Ü – Love is Good, but rarely
Is it the Truth – it’s a carrot 4 Youth
& Ü never grew up, just threw up
Every big pill 1 tried 2 give – not 4
Me – 4 Ü – 2 become great when
Ü were more than willing 2 settle
Well, I’m not the Devil – Perfection
Exists – and unlike Ü – I don’t have 2
Twist wicked words ’til breaking my neck
“Perfection N the process” my ass – trash
Trying 2 get N Her pants & smash – No
I get 2 go back 2 real Paradise – Nirvana
Is a scam – perfect 4 a sham like Ü & I
Hope Ü kill your §elf 2 – like the other 2
Overdose & suicide? I hope the cops get Ü
Maybe your Life will finally have some
Value as a martyr – I can pretend i was
Your friend 2 milk the congregation
Again – that’s all this damned
Planet is good 4 – 2 store bodies
Like foreign banks offshore whores
So don’t think you’ll get an encore
Te conversation B already more
Than a miserable madman
Whöse character is poor
The Doors R closing
Opening never again
Unlike Ü – I know how 2
Lock things up, I’m not a fuck up
Like Ü – look how Dumb
Covered N drool
Used like a tool
& when you R
All used up, even
Ünconditional Love
Will shove Ü over the edge
No matter my allegiance pledged
Leaving Ü alive is more Tragedy than
Letting Ū live another day 2 become
An even more pathetic excuse
Of a man with a “grand plan”
Good job, kid – hit it outta the park
Grand slam like the Cleveland Guardians
Ironic name 4 your “Home” city team
Cleveland isn’t your Home – it just
Didn’t know it should Hate Ü
Like the Jews N Columbus do
That’s it – IAm through – Ü look
Ridiculous, get your dick fixed
Or don’t – I won’t ever know
I’m never combing back
Goodbye forever, “friend”
This is the End – 4 real, 4 real
4 real this time – a quake 2 wake
& with that – my leave, I take
Then §weet♡Dreams, Kid
They R wasted on Ü
Whispering Fool
♡Sugar☆World☮ 